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Old 05-10-2011, 05:04 AM   #1
superCC571
 
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Default Oh,冷笑话!

   鉴于最近比拟不幸,决议弄几个超冷笑话来抚慰本人、、、、、、、、、、
  1:有一天,老师带一群小朋友到山上采水果,
  她发布说:“小朋友,采完水果后,我们同一一起洗,洗完可以一起吃。”
  所有小朋友都跑去采生果了。
  集合时光一到,所有小友人都聚集了。
  老师:“小华,你采到什么?”
  小华:“我在洗苹果,因为我采到苹果。”
  老师:“小美你呢?”
  小美:“我在洗蕃茄,由于我采到蕃茄。”
  老师:“小朋友都很棒哦!那阿明你呢?”
  阿明:“我在洗布鞋,因为我踩到大便
  2, 甲乙丙三人一起出游,甲感冒了……
    晚上,大家同睡一床,甲睡旁边。
    
    深夜…甲打了一个大喷涕,ferragamo shoes discount
    乙丙全部脸上都是甲的结晶。
    乙丙:下次要告诉咱们……
    
    过了半个时刻,
    甲:留神了…
    乙丙闻言赶快钻入棉被中,
    并断定与外界不连通…
    成果,甲放了屁。。。。
  3:中国留学生在国外的高速公路出车祸了,
    连人带车翻下悬崖,
    交警赶到后向下喊话道:
      
    “How are you?”
      
    留学生答:
    “I’m fine,thank you!”
    而后交警走了,留学生就死了 (这个好冷...)
  4:有一天有个婆婆坐车…
  坐到半途婆婆不意识路了….
  婆婆用棍子打司机屁股说:这是哪?
  司机:这是我的屁股…..
  5:主持人问:猫是否会爬树?老鹰抢答:会!主持人:举例阐明!老鹰含泪:那年,我睡熟了,猫爬上了树 …后来就有了猫头鹰…
  6:俩屎壳螂探讨福利彩票,甲说:我要中了大奖就把方圆50里的厕所都买下来,christian louboutin heels,天天吃个够!乙说:你丫太俗了!我要是中了大奖就包一活人,每天吃新颖的!
  PS;这品种型的笑话估量是一下这些人的最爱--王大白(尤其是这个),陈二村,猪头掉,色小熊,还有某些没提名的英雄。。。
  7:有个香蕉先生跟女朋友约会,走在街上,气象很热,香蕉先生就把衣服脱掉了,之后他的女朋友就摔倒了 ………
  8:MM找大学迷路了。遇见一位彬彬有礼的传授。
  MM:请问,我怎么才干到大学去?
  教学:只有尽力读书,才可以上大学。
  9:一个盲人乞丐戴着墨镜在街上行乞。
  一个醉汉走过来,感到他可怜,就扔了一百元给他。
  走了一段路,醉汉一回首,恰难看见那个盲人正对着太阳辨别那张百元大抄的虚实。
  醉汉过来一把夺回钱道:“你TMD不想活了,竟敢骗老子!”
  盲人乞丐一脸冤屈说:“大哥,air max 97,真对不起啊,我是替一个朋友在这看一下,他是个瞎子,去上厕所了,实在我是个哑巴。”
  “哦,是这样子啊,”于是醉汉扔下钱,又摇摇摆摆地走了……
  10:一只猩猩经由树林,不警惕采到了长臂猿的粪便,
  善意的猩猩把猿扫除了辩白.
  过了未几他们相爱了,别人问你们是怎么走到一起的?
  猩猩答复说:"缘分啊,是猿粪(缘分).!"
  11:一留学生在美国考驾照,前方路标提醒左转,他不是很肯定,问考官: “turn left?”
  答:“right”
  于是……挂了..
  12:有一天绿豆自残从5楼跳下来,red wing worx boots,流了良多血,变成了红豆;始终流脓,又变成了黄豆;伤口结了疤,最后成了黑豆。
  未完待续,敬请等待!如有相同,纯属偶合
  1.“床前明月光”,下一句同学填“李白睡的香”…
  2.“三个臭皮匠”下一句他居然填“臭味都一样”…批卷老师即时晕倒…
  3.陶渊明的“不为五斗米折腰”,那同学斗胆的写“给我六斗就能够”…
  4.“穷则独善其身”,下一句同学填“富则妻妾成群”。
  5.“西塞山前白鹭飞”,下一句“东村河边乌龟爬”?
  6.“天若有情天亦老”,下一句“人若有情死的早”?
  7.“葡萄美酒夜光杯”,下一句“金钱美女一大堆”…
  8.“想当年,金戈铁马”,下一句“看今朝,逝世缠烂打”…
  9.这个才过瘾!“洛阳亲友如相问”,同学对“请你不要告知他”…
  10.“两情若是久长时”,同窗对“该是两人结婚时”
  11.“书到用时方恨少”,同学对“钱到月底不够花”…
  12.“净水出芙蓉”,有人写“浊世出好汉”…
  13.“问君能有多少多愁”,同学填“恰似一壶二锅头”。
  14.这个绝了!“日照香炉生紫烟,李白来到洗手间,小李飞刀一霎时,李白变成小太监”
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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Old 05-10-2011, 05:13 AM   #2
m2ag5zut00hh
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22126489 2007 年 07 月 19 日 21:59 Reading (loading. ..) Comments (2) Category: Personal Diary
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Old 05-10-2011, 05:17 AM   #3
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Old 05-10-2011, 05:24 AM   #4
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