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Old 10-02-2011, 12:32 PM   #1
clairz4iy
 
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Default Relationship Comes to a Screeching Halt When Wife Folds Chase Utley

ScoopGods.com Â*- Neighbors were not quite sure what happened that Tuesday night when screaming erupted from the Dijakar residence, so our reporters went in to find out.Â* What we saw would make you send your heart out to the poor special needs person that must live in this house, and then make you want to leave because of the abrasive yelling and hysterical crying. There, in the open drawer of the couple's bedroom, a Chase Utley Jersey was folded neatly among various work-out shirts.Â* Our first observation was that whoever had done this can fold <a href="http://www.cheappumashoesonline.com/puma-clyde-baltic-super-pink-p-574.html"><strong>Puma Clyde (baltic / super pink)</strong></a> very well for a blind person.Â* Francis, the man of the home, came into the room a moment later and tore the jersey from the drawer.Â* We watched with half amused gazes as Francis waved the shirt in Helena, his wife's, face, emitting broken yelps of frustration and sounding complaints about how, "I cannot believe you managed to find your way out of your mother's womb, because you clearly have no capacity to read or discern value from garbage." Â*Helena sobbed harder as he continued, "I just don't see how I can share a bed with a woman who thinks a Chase Utley jersey belongs in the same drawer as my gym <a href="http://www.cheapmonclerjackets.es/chamonix-moncler-chaqueta-gris-p-101.html"><strong>Chamonix Moncler chaqueta gris </strong></a> shirts." While we do not agree with spousal abuse, we feel this situation is the exception.Â* "The David Herdon jersey Helena gave me for a gift <a href="http://www.cheappumashoesonline.com/puma-sports-mens-shoes-in-black-ghost-white-p-110.html"><strong>Puma Sports Mens Shoes In Black Ghost White</strong></a> last Christmas was confusing and frustrating, but we made it through," Francis told us.Â* The Herdon jersey now lines the bottom of their pit bull's cage in the basement. Francis is going to need a new Utley jersey now, and community members are joining together to raise money for the new garment this Saturday.Â* Helena Dijakar has been granted the luxury of slipping out quietly in the night to go stay with her humiliated family while her well-deserved bruises run from her in shame. Tags: argument, baseball, Chase Utley, Gifts, humor, satire, Sports
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